Tuesday 26 June 2012

A Weekend in the Life of Morsh

As always my weekend was pretty eventful.  I’ll take you through it step by step (calm down).

I went to Westfield on Friday night with a few of my friends, DESPERATELY trying to find some wellies for the impending Festival season.  I managed to get some nice ones out of River Island, silvery with multi coloured glitter all over for only £25, bargs!  Kind of like this, but I don't think they are black on the bottom...

I have decided I really want a Snapback too, probably something to do with my ongoing obsession with all things Watch The Throne related (you can blame Jay and Ye for this).  I really want a BOY London one ala Rihanna but I think i’m too much of a white girl to pull it off.  I also replaced my All Over Face Colour from Bare Minerals.  I decided to go bareback and see what my face looked like after a full day of work without putting it on in the morning, and we decided my rating was an 8 out of 10 (10 being BAD TIMES) so that’s when I knew I had to buy more.  I looked dead without it!

Saturday was a good day (apart from once aspect explained later), as I went to Knebworth to see Red Hot Chilli Peppers with my friend Charlie.  My other friend Hollie decided to be an actual saint and agreed to drive us there and pick us up if we covered her petrol which was amazeballs.  I planned my outfit and was definitely channelling Festival Cyndi Lauper.  Army boots, tights (that eventually ended up being ripped all over when I accidentally stubbed my fag out on my own leg) a black dress with a netted skirt, denim shirt over the top, millions of necklaces and a trilby.  Picture below for all of you that haven’t bothered to read that outfit description.  We got there and met up with our friends Charlie, Jack and Eddie (Eddie went dressed as a Chilli – amazing) and had a wicked time.  Supported by Reverend and the Makers (rubbish) The Wombats (averagely good but just for the bants), Dizzee Rascal (weird choice but BLOODY BRILLIANT), finally RHCP came on around 8.30ish.  I decided at some point in between The Wombats and Dizzee Rascal to lose my phone too, so that was nice.  I am GUTTED, I had been taking pictures of us all being our usual hilarious selves and I lost all of those as well as EVERYTHING else I hold dear to me in life.  Just to clarify, i’m not sure if I lost my phone or got pickpocketed but does it really matter?  Either way it was annoying as fuck.  Decided not to let it ruin my night as you’re only at Knebworth seeing RHCP once (probably) so YOLO, I just forgot about it til I got home.  Highlights of the day included Eddie throwing a bottle in the crowd and starting a full scale bottle war, all of us rapping along to Dizzee Rascal like we were pure bredders and RHCP performing Charlie (I was with 2 people called Charlie).  The night ended when we had to walk 30 minutes through a pitch black muddy field to get to the shut slip road on the motorway that my friend couldn’t get up, and had to cross a roundabout and walk DOWN another slip road directly onto a motorway to get into her car while she illegally waited on the hard shoulder for us.  Fun times.

Charlie, Jack, me, Eddie the Chilli and Charlie - It was a Charlie sandwich!

Me and Jack

Me and Charlie in my garrrden xx

Sunday was an equally epic day.  The morning was spent on the phone to O2, the insurance company, security at Knebworth and the police.  Then I decided that I needed to do something to my hair (mainly get the beer out of it as we got absolutely beer bombed all day on Saturday), and get ready for the sporting highlight of the weekend.  I met my friends in a lovely restaurant in Loughton called Tuscany and we had some Dim Sum for lunch, then went to the mighty Nu Bar to watch England spectacularly fail in the football (as always).  Such a funny afternoon, lots of banter, men shouting and entertaining football chants.  I don’t think I have EVER seen that many boys in one bar, the girls and I were in sausage heaven!

Watching the football in the saus fest Nu Bar and singing England Till I Die - obviously

I literally have the busiest summer ever this year.  We have worked out that between now and September 15th, we only have 1 weekend free (4th August if you want to get me booked up completely).  It’s nice having plans and knowing all the exciting things we are doing, but it’s also a bit daunting knowing that I don’t have any flexibility in what I want to do at the weekend.  To be fair though it’s not as if I am doing hard time for the next 2 months, when all of your plans involve festivals, birthdays, nights out and general bants it’s not exactly a bad thing.

Hope you all had a good weekend, WHERE HAS THE SUN GONE?  For now I am going to leave you with this dedication to my poor stolen/lost iPhone – I miss you baby x


Wednesday 20 June 2012

Day Make Up Routine - Summer / Holiday

If you are anything like me you HATE wearing heavy make up on holiday or when it’s sunny during the day.  Nothing makes me feel more disgusting then a face full of pore clogging foundation and a shed load of make up that’s likely to run in the heat!  I've run through my summer make up routine below, this is the normal routine I have for holiday day wear or days out in the summer (basically days when you want to look nice, but can't be dealing with a mask of make up) - Obviously if I am on holiday and just round the pool I just have sun cream on and have to deal with scaring small children.

Bare Minerals – Prime Time

I have gone on and on about this primer in my previous Bare Minerals post and that’s because I LOVE it.  Kind to your skin, it’s lightweight, easily blended, odour free and makes your face feel so soft – also the perfect base to apply your make up and make it long lasting.  Another bonus is that it didn’t affect my skin when I first started using it, as a few products have caused me to break out as I am not used to them, but this one was fine from the start.

Bare Minerals SPF15 Matte Foundation

I use this as a concealer, applying it using the Max Coverage Concealer brush also from Bare Minerals.  I just dab a bit of it under my eyes and cover any blemishes.  As this is also a foundation, when in a concentrated form it provides really great coverage but still feels lightweight on your skin.  After I have applied it as a concealer I use the Full Flawless Face Brush to swipe the excess over my face – This is brilliant for holidays as it’s SPF15 so will provide you with a small amount of sun coverage too, perfect if you wake up hungover looking like a monster and want something to attempt to cover up the proof of the carnage the night before!

17 BB Blemish Balm

If I feel like I need a bit of extra coverage (normally of an evening on holiday or on a particularly ugly day in the UK) I use this BB Balm.  I always speak highly of 17 products as although they are cheap they really do the job.  I like this as it’s quite a pigmented BB balm but not as much as foundation, somewhere in the middle.  I feel like I am wearing foundation when judging it on the level of coverage, but it’s super silky and light on your skin, so you don’t have that ‘caked on’ feeling when you put it on.

NARS Illuminator in Laguna


While in Vegas I decided to get a NARS value set as I hadn’t used any of their products before (believe it or not!).  I went with the NARS Beach Lover set which was perfect for me and I mainly bought it for the Illuminator (it also came with a Blush Duo, Soft Touch Shadow Pencil and Lip Gloss).  I apply a small dab of the Illuminator over my face once the primer, BB cream and concealer is applied as it sits a lot better with a even base to work with.  I wouldn’t go as far as to say it makes me look massively tanned (it IS just an Illuminator after all) but it does what it says on the tin - gives my skin a nice healthy glow and it does make you look a little bit browner – the colour of the Illuminator is basically a browny bronze and it looks a bit daunting, so I suggest you only use a dab of it otherwise you’ll end up looking like you’ve just applied a mud pack!  It’s odourless and the same as everything else in this post, is very lightweight.

Benefit Girl Meets Pearl

I just use this pearlescent highlighter over my cheekbones to give me a nice shimmer.  I find this brightens up my complexion a lot, even though it’s not used on my entire face.  It’s oil free too, so nice and lightweight.

Bare Minerals All Over Face Colour in True

I use the Flawless Face Brush to apply a dab of True to each cheek, just to give me a bit of colour.  As nice as it is applying all the make up above, I feel afterwards I do need to use a blush as it gives my face a kind of blank canvas look – free from blemishes and a more tanned complexion, but all weirdly one colour.  The blush does the trick to make me look a bit rosy J

Urban Decay Lush Lash Mascara

I like this mascara because it doesn’t easily clump your eyelashes together.  On holiday or in the summer I hate any eye make up that is thick and gloopy or runs.  My eyelashes are naturally thick and dark, so I just use this more for the curl and exaggeration than anything else.  The brush makes it really easy to use and seperates your eyelashes as you apply it, so you need to pay next to no attention when putting it on.  It also has a growth serum infused into it, so if you use it enough after a while you might not even need to apply mascara for much longer – bonus!

Benefit Lip Gloss in I’m With The Band

Last but not least, I use a slick of Ultra Shine lipgloss from Benefit to complete the look.  I got this miniature lip gloss in a set either last Christmas or sometime last year, and I love it.  It has a slight pearl effect to it and is a nice subtle pink colour.  It’s not incredibly sticky and find it has a relatively good staying power – it also tastes of Watermelon so I LOVE it for that reason!

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So that’s my holiday/summer make up routine.  I am never normally one for laying on thick make up anyway, obviously if I was going out at night I would probably add eyeliner/fake eyelashes/strong lipstick. 

Do you have a different make up routine for the summer than to the winter?  Have you found any awesome products/travel sized products you love taking away with you?  I’d love to hear of your routines, or any holiday make up secrets you have...

Thursday 14 June 2012

50 Shades of Grey

There is a new craze sweeping the libraries and Waterstones all over the world and its name is 50 Shades of Grey.  Dubbed ‘housewife porn’, this is probably one of the most ridiculous books I have ever read, yet I found myself throwing tourists out the way as I rushed to Tesco at lunch time to buy the second book in the trilogy, 50 Shades Darker (please note I went to Tesco to buy this book as it is £4 whereas everywhere else wanted at least £8 and I point blank refuse to pay that much for this load of crap – plus I wanted some Watermelon slices).

So, I can sense you all wondering why I went to buy the second and third books if the first one was so abysmal?  Well, I only have one explanation for this.  This book is so rubbish, SO RUBBISH that it’s actually brilliant.  I have tried many ways to describe this book, but the nearest I can get is the following recipe:

Recipe for 50 Shades of Grey

1.     Take 1x Twilight
2.     Remove all trace of Vampires
3.     Add 18,000 more buckets of teenage angst and thinly disguise as ‘innocence’
4.     Mix up and if still too full bodied, remove any trace of decent storyline.
5.     Once blended add a packet of filth, 5 tablespoons of smut and some derogation for good measure.
6.     Leave in bag until a suitable time, aka until no one can read it over your shoulder on the train – once removed, read quickly while still cool. 

I have read the first book and must say I was disappointed to see people had compared this to Twilight.  I KNOW most of you reading this will have either hated Twilight OR never seen it/read it, but I love Twilight.  The story is well thought out and well written if you can ignore all the contradictions and general twatishness of the female lead.  I do admittedly want to punch Bella in the head with something heavy and blunt, but my love for Edward Cullen trumps all so I can forgive the Twilight stories for a lot.  This book is NOTHING like Twilight.  The only similarity I can see is that there is a bloke that is clearly winning in life and he falls in love with a girl that is way below average.  She spends the rest of the book knowing this and feeling totes awkward about the fact the guy likes her, and everyone reading the book has NO IDEA why he likes her either as she is a top pleb.

50 Shades of Grey starts with some melt called Ana being roped into interviewing the immensely successful, rich, beautiful and bossy Christian Grey for a magazine interview arranged by her friend.  She literally falls face first into his office and makes Christian want her, but he doesn’t want her like a normal person would want her.  He genuinely just wants to beat the absolutely pervy shit out of her in his ‘red room of pain’ and makes her agree to be his submissive and sign a contract, even though she is a virgin and has a shit fit at the thought of even touching his arm (which subsequently, she is not allowed to do because Christian is all WEIRD and DARK and has UNDERLYING ISSUES).  Enter lots of graphic sex scenes that left me feeling genuinely embarrassed reading it on the train and lots of talk of her ‘inner goddess’ having an absolute melt down every time she sees Grey and you suddenly come to the end of the book.

I walked away from this story wondering why I had bothered, but then everyone just kept banging on about it and I found myself wondering what happened in the next books.  Surely the author had to up her game for the prequels, so what was she going to write in them?  At the risk of sounding like a total perv, I was kind of interested & bought them – so sue me.

Expect me to read these and then be even more annoyed that I wasted a total of £10 on all 3 books (beat that Waterstones you total fucking rip off!).

P.S My mum saw the first book on my floor and asked what it was about and I had to lie and say I hadn’t read it yet – cringe!

Have you lot read any of them yet?  If so what do you think?  If you say you prefer it to Twilight then you probably just need to sign some sort of register.

Thursday 7 June 2012

Guest Blog: Kev James does Big Brother - BE WARNED, CONTENT UNSUITABLE FOR MOST PEOPLE

Big Brother has started again, and already people are massively opinionated on this year’s set of Housemates.  I will be watching this series, I watched the opening night as I was interested to see who had been picked and was pleased to see they haven’t gone too OTT on the weird - I prefer it when it’s quite a few normal people.  I auditioned for Big Brother earlier in the year, I sent in an audition tape and got asked to go to the auditions at Wembley as I had been fast tracked through the first round but didn’t go.  I am not going to lie, it was a mixture of not being able to have the time off work as I left it too late to book it and being a bit scared.  I am RUBBISH when it comes to being ‘quirky’ and outgoing on demand.  I know my friends probably think I am mental anyway, but when it comes to being myself in front of a room full of strangers, I can’t do it.  I prefer to just sit around listening until I feel comfortable to act like my real self, which is clearly not the sort of thing the producers were looking for.  I would have needed to hide behind something, anything – another person, a prop, even role playing would have been fine.  Just having a room of people scrutinising me to see if my REAL SELF was suitable for them filled me with dread and it would have been the most embarrassing, horrific experience for me.  So I just decided not to do it.   It hasn’t stopped me from watching it with my friends and wondering how weird it would have been if I was in the house with those housemates though... I like to think I probably would have sworn less than that actual disgrace Ashleigh as she’s the token Essex girl in there, therefore probably took the spot I would have had if I had actually got anywhere in the audition process.
Anyway, I took great delight in tweeting my way through BB on Tuesday night when it started, and my friend Kev (who is one of the funniest people I have ever met) did the same thing.  He has kindly written a guest blog on his thoughts on the first episode of Big Brother, and I have attached it below for your amusement.  If you read this and decide you want to read more from Kev, follow him on Twitter at @LLKevJisBack – Remember, these are Kev’s views, NOT my own and if you don’t like it take it up with him.  I’m pretty sure he won’t give  a shit though.  Also, if you are eating or drinking while you are reading this, prepare for it to come out of your nose...
Big Brother 2012
So here we go again, Big Brother is back like an unwanted flare-up of genital herpes, invading our homes like an ageing gang of tinkers looking for things to steal.  It was by pure misfortune alone that I flicked over to Channel 5 to find myself greeted with Bryn Dowling’s fucking ridiculous face that he’s so comfortable with wearing.  Warbling at us in his homo-erotic tones whilst desperately trying to read the autocue, he looked as comfortable as a man who’s had a healthy percentage of the Ryanair cabin crew wedged firmly inside his asshole. I thought, ‘fuck it, let’s see what this show has to offer me’.  Those who follow me on Twitter will know that I’ve always got a positive spin to put on reality TV offering’s – for example, my TOWIE commentaries are always full of praise for the gifted cast who positively enrich my life twice a week, so why not see if I could find some material to work with on Channel 5?  I wasn’t disappointed….
First in was Deana, a woman who at first glance was quite pretty... pretty fucking aggravating. I haven’t seen a woman look down her nose that much since Daniella Westbrook came out of septum surgery; she thinks she is the absolute bollocks.  In reality she’s probably got a pair of bollocks if Channel 5 is anything to go by - think along the lines of ‘Something about Miriam’ etc.  Deana was closely followed by Aaron, so closely in fact he was probably trying to look at his reflection in her shiny black mop.  This fella needs all of his teeth smashing out with a hammer and put back in upside down - He’s supposed to be a cage fighter?  Well his fucking grid looked like a cage, with a great white inside trying to nibble its way out.  Alright, he’s not bad looking but anyone who attempts that poxy Justin Bieber hairdo needs attacking with blunt sticks. Next came Caroline from Surrey dahhhhling... Hmmm, her fucking hair looked like it been borrowed from the Doctor in Back to the Future – Let’s see how long it takes for the silver spoon that’s been wedged firmly up her ass since birth to be stolen and used as drug paraphernalia by resident cribs gang-banger Adam, who at 27 looks like he’s spent a good 50 years delivering papers in the Himalayas.  If that c*nt is 27 then it must be in fucking dog years!  He looks like a fat, black John Travolta. Someone take him shopping when he gets out, that Byrite waistcoat had me vomming into my own lap…..which was inconvenient as I was getting damn near fellated to death by the cat!
We also had the lovely Shevonne from Lewisham who looks very much like a young Sinitta (when I say young I mean 48).  What the fuck is going on in Saaaaf Londaaan?  Shevonne doesn’t drink the water apparently, but if I was her I’d start on the fluids lively, I haven’t seen an ageing process that suspect since Benjamin Button! Hmmmm who else was there?  Oh yes, the lovely Conor, I didn’t think I could feel any more venom towards an Irishman than that which I harbour towards Danny from the Script/the voice/the fuck knows what he’s from….but this c*nt thinks his fucking David Beckham?!  I wouldn’t mind but for someone with railings that fucking crooked he is taking the piss, his grid looked like Stepney after the war, a row of bombed houses?! What did his mum feed him with a fuckin catapult??
Then there was Lauren from Jersey…I don’t know about you but people from the Channel Islands freak me out, Wicker Man weirdness - I’m pretty sure she’s been touched inappropriately by someone she trusts, although she is a black belt so I’m looking forward to her putting some sick moves on Deena the snotty c*nt!
We were then treated to Luke Scrase (which sounds a little bit too close to scrotum for my liking). I took an immediate dislike to this cretin after he opted to turn up for his first time on TV in what looked suspiciously like a purple Ben Sherman shirt - apparently he’s a club promoter, which as he’s from Stoke On Trent, means his fucking jobless as there isn’t a club worth promoting in that shithole – It probably also means that the purple Ben Sherman is currently being paid for week by week along with most of the other possessions in his house via Littlewoods finance….MUG! I was also deeply offended by his Professor Green haircut.  I honestly feel that if you’re going to copy Pro Green’s do then you should let me glass you in the neck just to complete the transformation.  Apparently he wants 4 kids in the next 5 years which is fucking optimistic even by Gary Glitter’s standards….god help us all!
I think we then had Lydia who looks like a shit Nelly Furtado (so we’ll call her Nearly Fur-Turdo).  She seemed bland, uninteresting and forgettable... then it was revealed that she was soon to become a member of one of the most sinister, incestuous families in British history!  No she’s not marrying one of Fred West’s lot, she’s engaged to Andy Scott Lee!  Apparently Josef Fritzel’s daughter turned down a projected move to the Scott-Lee foster home as she thought they were too fucking weird... Anyway, Lydia will be gone on Friday after her meltdown 10 minutes into the program.  I’ll keep an eye out for her on the news!
Then we had my tip for the win... Benedict, the grotty old porn star ex Teacher from Beal High School (which is just round the corner to where I live).  He’s good looking, obviously got a bit of a piece on him, well dressed and charismatic – This geezer can do no wrong... apart from the fact that he’s got a tongue fatter than Jamie Oliver’s and when he gets excited there’s so much saliva flying round the room the need for lube is reduced 100 fold.  I haven’t seen that much moisture since David Milliband and Louis Spence had a competition over who could say sausages the most in 5 minutes whilst sitting in a sauna, in speedos, salivating….!! MOIST
I think we were then treated to what looked like a real life Teddy Ruxpin but was in fact Chris James, which worried me as he possesses both my middle and last names but is hopefully of no relation... Apparently he’s a doorman, but he looked more like a door, dressed head to toe in High and Mighty clobber and with a voice so squeaky that my dog puked up and tried to have sex with one of my trainers.  If this fella tried to throw me out of a club i’d tickle him and then beat him to death with his own bracelet…….overrated and overweight!
We then had some chef called Luke who bored me instantly, then I read that he’s transgender and started life as a woman and thought to myself “thank fuck there’s some normality in there at last”.  How long shall we give it before he bursts into tears and starts lactating in the corner before breastfeeding Scott Mason, who at 21 looks like he’s spent a good part of his life underwater pretending to be a barracuda?  I haven’t seen a moosh that fish-like since Lydia from TOWIE inflicted her all-seeing cod-eye upon us nearly 2 years ago.
Sara was ushered in around this time looking 8 foot tall and HOT until she opened her mouth and I realised that she sounded like a Glaswegian crack head who’d probably stab you to death if you didn’t make her cum first time round……nice to look at but seems fiery, how long till she head butts another girl??
I can’t remember a thing about Caroline so I’m going to move on to my instant least favourite housemate, the lovely Ashleigh.  If you hadn’t guessed from her beautiful accent, she’s from Essex, although I thought she sounded like she was straight out of a skip in Tilbury - I haven’t seen a hole that dirty since I went swimming at Canvey Island and ended up with a nappy stuck to my boat.  Apparently her dream job is to be an Air Hostess - to me that’s just another way of saying “I’d like to sample as much intercontinental penis as possible and get paid for it please”.  Where the fuck did they dig up this disgusting c*nt?  I will pay good money for Deana and Lauren to tag team this whore and iron her out before letting Benedict loose on her with his wet mouth and his well educated weapon.  It’s good to know that after TOWIE we’ve got people like Ashleigh helping to maintain the high standards of Essex set by that bunch of c*nts...
With that, i’m out - enjoy the next 10 weeks, I’m off to take my hormone tablets, grow some tits and audition for next year.
Fuck You
Kev James
@LLKevJisBack

(Morsh says you can appluade now)

Friday 1 June 2012

Lyrical Relief

Last night I left work early to go to the doctors and decided to listen to a bit of Arcade Fire on the train.  If you are reading this because you follow me on Twitter then you will know how OBSESSED I am with Arcade Fire anyway, but lately I haven’t really been listening to them and have got back into Jay-Z and Kayne (thanks to the brilliant Watch the Throne).  Anyway, I whacked on Funeral by Arcade Fire and was literally astounded by how amazing it was... it kind of felt like I was listening to it for the first time all over again. 

I have loads of favourite songs, I don’t know if I could ever pick just one.  I have a few that stick in my mind recently but I chop and change frequently as new music comes out and I rediscover old music.  I honestly don’t know how I would be able to live without music in my life!

As you can see below it’s a bit of a weird mixture, but then my iPod literally has everything.  One Direction to Marlyin Manson, Jay-Z to Les Fleurs... my iPod is probably full of the most random mixture of music known to man.  I love talking to people about music and hearing what their favourite song is and why, or what memories albums hold for them etc... I suppose that’s just me being nosy haha!  I’ve listed my Top 10 songs at the moment and why they are my favourites:

  1. Jay-Z & Kayne West – Niggas in Paris As i’ve just got back from Vegas this is top of my playlist at the moment.  We heard it quite a lot over there and just as we went I was obsessed with Watch the Throne so put the album on at every opportunity in the room.  This resulted in all 4 of us spending the entire holiday walking round singing it, and I mean literally THE ENTIRE HOLIDAY!
  2. Drake – The MottoAs boring as it is, this is the same reason.  Heard it lots in Vegas, another song for the room.  Also a lot of saying “YOLO” and every available opportunity, even though we all think it’s the most ridiculous saying ever!
  3. Bombay Bicycle Club – Always Like This  - This song is an old love and reminds me of summer and festivals and cider – 3 of my favourite things!  As the weather has been beautiful lately I like listening to my ‘summer songs’ on the train and this is one of my favourites – It literally sounds like they made it just to play it at a festival.
  4. Red Hot Chili Peppers – Snow ((Hey Oh))Obviously an old song, but one of my favourites from RHCP.  Most of their songs are mental and loud and upbeat, but I like that this is a bit more relaxed and laid back... another favourite to listen to while laying around in the sunshine.  I’m going to see RHCP at the end of June too, so this is getting me prematurely excited for that – and premature excitement isn’t normally a good thing.
  5. Will Smith – Wild Wild WestI thought about this song for the first time in YEARS the other day.  I instantly downloaded it and was slightly concerned to realise I still know every single one of the words!  Since I downloaded it I have been busting it out in my car while on the motorway to get to the girls – Literally if I am not listening to music, then this song has been stuck in my head for the past week just on loop, OVER AND OVER AGAIN.  With classic lines like “any damsel that’s in distress, be outta that dress when she meets Jim West” how can anyone blame me?
  6. Santana feat Rob Thomas – SmoothVegas rediscovered this song for me.  We were on our last day, sitting in the McDonalds in our hotel about an hour before we had to leave for the airport.  We were packed, ready to go and totally depressed, then this song came over the speakers.  Charlie and I were instantly like “I LOVE THIS SONG” and it cheered us up a bit singing along to this while stuffing our faces with big macs.
  7. 3LW – No Morethanks to Watch the Throne and various Vegas discussions, I decided to come back home and try and make the R&B playlist to end all playlists.  I have already created The Best Playlist in the World Ever Part 1 which is full of the greatest rock and indie songs to ever have been created, and now I am working on the R&B version.  This song was one I found while looking through YouTube and I used to LOVE it when I was in school!  Especially the cringey rap bit in the middle.
  8. Justice – Phantom Pt 2An AWESOME song to pick you up in the morning, I love house music anyway and this song just makes me want to go to Ibiza pronto!  Awesome to blare out loud in your car while the sun is out, although when you have a Peugeot 207 and one of the speakers is a bit crackly you just end up looking like a tool.
  9. Beyonce – CountdownI don’t even know why I love this song, I just do.  It’s not very ‘Beyonce’, I had been hearing this in clubs for weeks before I ever realised it was her.  Just one of those songs that you shouldn’t like but you really do, and it manages to put a smile on your face whenever you hear it – better than walking around snapping your fingers and glaring at men while singing “Run the World” anyway..
  10. Solu Music – FadeLast one in my playlist, and this is probably my most favourite chill out house track of all time.  Reminds me of the first time I went to Ibiza all those years ago (8 years ago!!  EIGHT!) and I love it now as much as I did the first time I heard it.  No matter where I am, if I listen to this song and close my eyes I can almost pretend I am on a sunlounger on the beach – until some fat prick stands on my foot on the underground anyway...

What are your favourite songs at the moment and why?  I love hearing about other people’s choices and the meaning behind them, shows you an insight into what they are really like and how they think J